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2010 Physician Directory

Sonoma Medicine

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Volume 61, Number 1 - Winter 2010

Medical Arts

The H1N1 Influenza Blues

By Jessica Flinders, FNP

Disclaimers: Names have been changed

To protect the innocent.

I love my job, I really do.

***

I’ve had this awful feeling.

I’m sure you’ve had it too.

It’s called the H1N1

Influenza blues.

They warned us back in April:

“Grab a mask and hang on tight.

It’s gonna be Pandemic:

Get ready for the fight.”

And they were right.

***

Gather round now and listen

To how the blues began.

They started on a Monday

At Tommy’s five-year-old exam.

Tommy’s folks don’t do vaccines

Of any kind or strain.

“You know those shots cause autism,

And Tommy won’t like pain.”

No, they will not immunize him.

For once I do not care:

It means a lot less hassle.

What’s wrong with laissez faire?

So when the visit’s over

I rise up from my chair

And reach out for the doorknob,

A move to make with care.

“Wait!” his mother panics.

“Tell me everything you know

About that H1N1 vaccine,

Please, before you go.”

That’s how it starts, that feeling

The one that you have too:

The H1N1 malady

The Influenza Blues.

***

The blues return on Tuesday

Not missing any beat.

A mother rings the front desk:

She whines and stamps her feet.

“My Sally has diabetes,

She needs that shot, you see.”

And when my MA calls her

Out of kindness and concern

That is when it happens:

The Blues take a new turn.

Sal’s mom says she’s been reading

That the vaccine is just too new.

It really is not something

To subject her Sally to.

I tell you friends, it’s no fun

It really gets to you:

The gosh-darned H1N1

Influenza Blues.

***

The Blues are playing Wednesday

As I walk in through the door.

There are charts and call-backs waiting

Phone lines ringing—yes, all four.

So I call upon my cell phone

To rectify this scene.

My patients save my number,

Which shows up on their screen,

And call me for appointments,

Please, at five-fifteen.

I ask you friends, what medicine

Is it that you use

To help you with the H1N1

Influenza Blues?

***

Bright and early Thursday

The blues develop rhythm.

The mother is hysterical,

The nine-year-old is grim.

“We called at eight this morning,

They said to come right in.

Joey’s got an innocent murmur.

What risk group does that make him?”

I’ve got that crazy feeling,

I know that you do too:

The one that they’ve been calling

The Influenza Blues.

***

Well finally it’s Friday.

I’ve almost made it through

A long, long week of coping

With the H1N1 tune.

In front of me sits Sarah

With a temp of 1-0-2.

She’s got a noisome cough

And a sib at risk for flu.

What is a girl to do?

The better course of valor

Is to run a rapid test,

Before I write an Rx

For Tamiflu and rest.

I reach my Dacron q-tip

High up her right nares.

She glares at me with malice,

Lets loose a mighty sneeze.

***

I’ve got an awful feeling,

I’m sure you’ve had it too.

It’s called the H1N1

Influenza Blues.

Poetry night starts at seven

With Enrique and Maria.

I really like their black beans

But tonight I’ll drink tequila.

So I could use your help, folks,

From every one of you,

To get me through these crazy

Influenza Blues.

Back to Sonoma Medicine Winter 2010 Table of Contents